I was glad to read you’re looking for funny MG, and you’re a fan of Terry Pratchett. I think middle grade readers with Pratchett’s appreciation of the ridiculous will enjoy my MG novel, THE BUNGLEWAD SQUAD.
Stubby Hintertail thought life in his isolated mountain village couldn’t get any worse. The Captain of his Boot Camp already assigned him to the lowly Bunglewad Squad because his corkscrew tail makes him a grade-A klutz. And being squad mates with a monstrous cat who can’t stop eating, a whiskerless close-talker, and a hypochondriac who wraps herself in tree bark is bad enough. But now, Stubby’s mother rescues a peculiar kitten from the river, enrolls it into the Bunglewad Squad, and charges Stubby to watch over it like a brother.
The sadistic Captain Marks detests the bizarre kitten, and Stubby for being its brother. He tries to punish them all with harsh drills, but grows irate when he can’t do a single thing to wipe away the new kitten’s smile. The Captain doubles and redoubles his efforts to make them suffer, but this has unexpected results on Stubby’s squad, due to a fact no one realizes about Stubby’s new brother.
Can Stubby and the rest of THE BUNGLEWAD SQUAD learn to be functioning cats, with a little help from a dog?
THE BUNGLEWAD SQUAD is a completed 41,000 word MG book that’s The Bad News Bears meets Warriors.
As for me, I’m a crossword puzzle constructor published in the NY and LA Times.
Thank you for your time, and congrats on the blockbuster success of Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children!
THE BUNGLEWAD SQUAD
A small gray cat teetered on a high branch with one paw curled around a red crab apple. “Father, hurry!” he shouted. “This apple is burning my nose, and I’m losing my balance again!” A breeze kicked up and he dug his claws into the swaying oak.
“Just a moment, Stubby,” his father said from below. He stood erect on his hind legs and patted down white fur exploding from his head. “Proceed to drop it.”
“Are you sure?” Stubby asked. “You won’t get hurt?” Stubby cracked an eye open, but quickly squeezed it shut as he caught a glimpse of the eerie
“I don’t know--it may be even more painful than the granite rock,” his father replied. “But science waits for no cat! And please remember: as my apprentice-in-training, you must follow my every instruction.”
“Sorry, sir,” Stubby mumbled. All the other privates are right, he thought. I’m just a stupid, good-for-nothing bungler. He shuddered as he pictured the village sign which haunted his every moment:
THE STRONG SHALL LEAD
THE ADEQUATE SHALL WORK
THE FAILURES SHALL LEAVE
What if I fail at Zwicksturm Boot Camp AND this science apprenticeship? I’d be exiled from our village, into the wild! Who knows what crazy beasts live outside the Great Stone Schutzwall?